Lies don't just go away with a prayer

Yesterday was supposedly my last day for my internship at Macpherson. Unfotch, work kept piling up, errands kept coming my way, colleagues just became much more interesting to chat to, I ended up not being able to finish 2 designs on time. Therefore, I gotta return tomorrow in the morning to wrap things up properly , if not Humsup Boss and Mother Goose will withhold my pay then avoid my calls and ignore my emails.

Later in the afternoon, I made my way back to school for some talk regarding the academic and timetable.

Almost everyone in my batch was there. Some changed for the better, some stayed the same. I don’t know if I feel happy seeing them again.

School is good in a way that I can do whatever I want, so long I don’t screw up and can move on in time. But school is bad in a way that, I need to pretend to like some people, and take them as friends in order to stay afloat and survive.

I hate to admit this, admit that I pretend and tolerate people I can’t stand. And in order to “stay afloat and survive”, I drive myself nuts with the hatred and disgust in me.

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By the way, what do you call a close friend in school who never took the effort to calls nor messages (and don’t even talk about meeting up), for 2 months of internship? And after two months, she return into your life but changed into another person you can barely stand talking to? A person so full of herself, so shockingly bitchy, a christian who supposedly goes to church very often but turned out this way?

Sorry (ho ho) to pick out the fact that she’s a christian, but I always never thought too much of people who keep going on and on bout their god and what they believe in. They just don’t turn out to be very honest people.

TALG is dead.

Email me at Dontstalkmepls[at]yahoo.com to be updated. ;)

Denim Dress and Red Dolly

Something I got from Levi's...


The front...



The back...


Blah, crap lah. I don't recall Levi's making maternity wear.

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I can't believe I made and finished this dress yesterday (when I haven't even learn how to make a dress, but then again, this is pretty straightforward). It just took me less than half a day, but of course, I had my mum to thank for as she helped me with the sleeves. Ahh, she's great like that.


In my personal opinion, this dress is not wearable in Singapore because the material (medium weight denim) too damn thick and unbreathable. For your information, I made some alteration to the design so it will meet the requirements for it be suitable for fall/winter. So now you know, I am hardly ever inspired by unpracticality.


And yes... I have a very funky red dress form at home.. A hand-me-down from mummy. I used to be soooo goddamn scared of this dolly, and I once kept having horrible nightmares about her. Thank god I outgrown my fear.



And one day I might be sleeping with dolly in my room. (ermm, as in, I work in my room. What are you thinking?!)

Mum will drug me.

I am thankful that my nose is blocked now.

I don't understand. What is it that cats eat that makes their fresh poo sooooooo smelly?! It smells like baby poo.

Sometimes I hate cats cause they do nothing more than just eating, sleeping, pooing, peeing, biting and scratching you when you try to "bond" with them, and attempting to trip you over by walking below your feets.

One of these day, I am going to scoop the cat poo into an airtight bag, keep it tight, and if ever I lose this cat (who still doesn't have a proper name), I am going to take a whiff of the preserved poo, and remind how lucky am I to eventually free myself of such torture and commitment.

And if ever another "nice" friend try to send me a pussy picture to tempt me into adopting another cat, I am going to take a whiff of that preserved poo to keep off the temptation too.


If I don't do it, my mum will do it for me. Trust me, she will.

Things I can come up with at 6am in the morning.

I am seriously considering skipping ship. I don't know if I'm paranoid or what, I just don't feel safe in this ship. I think, one day I will sink my ship first, before pirates from my sea finds my ship and sink me.

My ship is my haven, only special people come on board. Preferably people who don't give me mind-rape day after day.

I think I need some time to learn how to sail my new ship, as well as to build my new ship. In the mean time, I need to think up of a cool cool name for my new ship. A good name is important you know?! A lotta queer-dos have been mistaking that my ship is trading child porn(!!!). Dangerous. Before I get my ass haul in for questioning, I think I should stop sailing my current ship soon.

I need good names.

NO, no name like Chips Ahoy! No Sarong String, No Big Treasure Chest, No Got Milk?, No Bald Pirate, No Bao-derful or Bun intended.

No, no names like, Dolphin Love. No Love Boat, No Cruising with Tom's Dick & Harry's, No Great Singapore Sail.


I will need some time.

Until then, I will stay put in this ship and keep a lookout for pirate. So Dangerous.

Anything is illegal.

I say, something is goddamn wrong in the world today, when I didn't even dare to download a song off P2P.

I really didn't.

There are so many songs I would like to intro you guys. Songs that reminds me of people, songs that bring back memories best forgotten, songs that are just plain good.

Now I can't. It just isn't the same if I just cut+paste the lyrics to show you. Will you get the song at your own will? I bet you won't.

On another note, I think I better delete my somewhat huge collection of mp3/wma files on one particular computer I always use in the lab. I ripped them into my folder for my convenience - so I don't have to bring audio CDs to school or jam my thumbdrive with just a couple of mp3s. The last I read, it is against the law to copy musics, even those from the CDs you bought to your computer.


As much as I like men in uniforms, I would very much prefer them in my bedroom than them ringing my bells (this sounds kinky too) coming to get me.


So scary.

You've been brainwashed.

One of the simple pleasures me and my fellow classmates enjoy now is the occasional (ok lah, more like daily now) piping hot cup noodles. In times like these, we can be rather tight on cash - we need to get materials and etc, ya know. So in order to survive, we'll have to scrimp on food.

Anyway, cup noodles are very convenient, there isn't a need to eat it immediately once purchased, unlike food such as Horfun, or Hokkien Mee... or Mee Rubus, Chicken Chop... Kway Chap...

Ah.. I digress.

So last night, a whole bunch of us had cup noodles for dinner in the lab. Before we even began devouring it, I saw a portly figure entered the computer lab.

OMFG. It's the director.

Of all fucking people, the DIRECTOR!


Actually he seems pretty alright about us eating in the lab, he even invited us some for catered buffet.

So, what's a director doing at 9p.m on a friday in school? To show face at some school organized dance lah.


My school has this habit of organizing dance and parties during school terms, so as to conjure up a sense of *hIpNeSs^ and fun in the environment. Like, how often do we see Engineering school having such fun events like RETRO PARTY man?! So yea, while I was mugging my work in the lab, the 2nd level was blasting Twist and Shout in the stereo. Sibei annoying. If it's not for the food, I would even go near that so-called dance hall.

Without a doubt, the food was disappointing, and I heard the fried vemicelli was cao sng already. Damn turned off. So the only thing a disappointed girl can do then was to take a peek at the dance floor.


Priceless.


A darkened hall with gaudy spinning lights, no seats, a bunch of ostentious teenagers standing around, some trying to dance to the beat of Twist and Shout (I think it was on repeat), with the projector screening a Linux desktop, with the mouse twirling around, looking for adobe photoshop, so that the person behind the screen can get some work done while partying.


So you think you can become an instant hip icon in school because you attended a school organized party? And so you thought you guys instantly became best friends just because you stucked together for that party?



You've been brainwashed, my young ones.

creativity

Remember I once said I was preparing to fail a module?

The other day, my lecturer bumped into me in the lab.


"Do you need to pass this subject?"
"Ya.. of course. But I can't, I've already failed by attendance."

"Well, as long as you complete the final two assignments by next lesson, I'll give you a grade."

And so, my lecturer has graciously given me another chance. But frankly, she is secretly doing this against the school rules, because she does not believe in churning out warning letters for absenteesm and unpunctuality.

In fact, she'll be leaving after this semester because she can't stand the structure (I don't mean the architectural aspect) of the school.

Another part-time lecturer in my course has lamented that the stuff we are doing are "crap" and the skills we learnt are not up-to-date.

I agree with them. If I have the money, I'll go to Raffles LaSalle and concentrate on studying Fashion Design, and bask in the shadow of Sven Tan.

But because I'm an average Singaporean who haven't strike lottery, I can only afford to study in government tertiary schools such as, wat-eh-ver-wat-eh-ver, and learn things such as sewing, grading (machiam I am graduating to be a Seamstress), stuff like manufacturing and sourcing (machiam I wanna be a factory supervisor), and retail and merchandising (machiam I wanna be a sales personnel). All in the name of grooming us into well-rounded graduates who knows a little about everything (but their design are mediocre).

When people ask me what am I studying I go, "I'm doing apparel design." And they go, "Huh?", and then I say, "which is fashion design lah."

I cannot say the latter first because they'll assume I am in some arty farty school, whole day design design design, but in actual fact, I am running around in school, trying to squeeze in time to write report/sew/draw and other stuff unrelated to design.

The more I think of it, the more disillusioned I feel. My school environment is NOT focused on creativity but submissions, attendances and punctuality. I think that's all they are concerned about.

Now I know why I see some lecturers wandering around in school like zombies, going to class when needed to, and run off to the busstop at 6p.m. on the dot.


All thanks to a school soooo clean with no graffiti at all - the real freedom of expression.

My Fears.

As much as I (try to) appear to be strong and confident, there are many things in life I fear.


When I used to have pretty long hairs, I feared losing them. After I lost them, I forgotten how it was like when I still had them.

I fear the day when my blog will be discovered by my classmates, and I'll have to blogicide my blog. I check my sitemeter so I can monitor if anyone (other than me) visited my blog on the school's IP address.

I fear an ungentlemanly jerk. I really do. You cannot imagine the kind of horrible stuff they'll say about a girl once they start to get sick of her.

I fear losing my loved ones in a traffic accident.

I fear losing my cat in a horrible and gruesome death.

I'm afraid I may step on my cat when I walk. You know lah, cats love to follow closely around.

I fear flying roaches.

I fear losing my fingers in a sewing accident. I kid you not on that.

I fear bumping into him.. and him.

I kinda fear school holidays. Because Holiday = Isolation = May plunge into depressed mode, and Holiday = Inactivity = Gain another 5kg.

I fear I will never be loved and I may never get married. But at the same time, I fear losing my identity in a relationship.

I fear losing the desire to hang around with some people, because I can't stand it when people become dependent on me. At the same time, I fear hanging out with people who can't stop talking, especially when I am not in the mood to talk.


What are your fears?

Monopoly sucks.

Dear Ms Lim,

Thank you for your email of 20/08 .

We are pleased to inform you that your feedback is receiving our attention.

________________

Huh? Is that all you have to say? It sounds like a computer-generated email using template lorh.

No apology? No complimentary ticket? No saga to continue? Just a "pleased to inform" me that you spent 5mins of your attention to read and click "send template reply" button?


I hate Monopoly!!!!

Ass will be ass?

Today is crap day. I shall not dwell into miscellaneous bad things that happened to me today. Lets go into the detail now.


I was on my way home from school, when I boarded the bus at 7:30pm. I paid $1.10 in coins (the right fare) as I do not have enough value in my EasyLink. The guy before me paid first, then me. Yea, so no biggie, I paid my fare and got my bus ticket.


3 stops down, a ticket attendant board the bus. I took out my ticket and realised, my ticket is of 55cents value! When the ticket attendant came to my seats, I told him about my ticket and he just shrugged it off and said, "Tell the bus driver."

Yea, so fine. No biggie to me. I can walk.

"Excuse me, I paid $1.10 and you gave me a 55ct ticket. Can you give me another ticket with the correct value?!"
"Huh?"
"I said, I paid ONE TEN and you gave me a FIFTY-FIVE cents ticket. Can you give me another ticket of ONE TEN VALUE?!"

*Tongkelongtong* $1.10 ticket issued.

No sorry, no apologies.

I went to the back to hand my ticket to the ticket attendant. He ignored me. And it's not like I threw the ticket into his fucking nonchalant face, I said "Excuse Me". Two times.


Fed up with the lousy treatment, before I got off at my stop, I walked to the front once again, and confronted the driver.

"Excuse me, may I know your name?!"
"Why?" (still have the cheek to speak back and demand! He must have sensed something is going wrong)
"Tell me your name first."

He fumbled and showed me his nametag. He was trying to be evasive, trying to hide his full name with part of his index finger. I looked closely at the shiny gold name tag and got his name.

Mohammad Sahalim.

"Next time, please don't give the wrong ticket value to passenger. It is not fair at all."
"No, just now the person paid before you and I think you took his tic...."
"NO, I am very sure I said ONE-TEN and you issued me the ticket. And one more thing, there is no such thing as a FIFTY-FIVE CENT ticket anymore."

He pretend to end it all by closing the doors and drive off.

"Please open the door, I want to get off now!"

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After I got off the bus, I was so incensed that I need to miss a couple of buses for me to gather back my thoughts and recollect myself.

Wah lao, so embarrassing. To be ignored by the ticket attendant. But at least I justified my position.

I was so freeeaking annoyed. How come the dude before me has no problem with his ticket, while I have?! It must be Mister Mohammad Sahalim's first encounter with a shaven-headed girl boarding his hell-bus, he must have felt too surprised and can't get his acts together!

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Any paying passenger has the right to tell off the bus driver if we felt that, the way the bus is being driven is putting our lives and safety at risk, or when he short change us in our bus fares.

This is not the first time I've received bus tickets below the value I've paid for. But this is definitely the first time I've received a ticket value of 55cent. In this day and age.

You think I stupid issit?! Now where got ticket 55cts one?! You think I've been living under a rock, and wasn't aware of the numerous fare hike adjustments?!

I am going to comprain! You driver of SBS405S! What?! Gimme complimentary ticket?! No thanks hor, I need to go until dunno-where to collect one puny ticket!

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If your drivers have been practicing this anyhow-issue-ticket habit for a long long time, I am VERY surprised. First, doesn't your company tally your collect ticket fares? If you do, I am sure there are surpassing amount in each collection, since your drivers has this unethical habit of issuing tickets below paid value.

I am sure you'll be making "unknown" profit each month. OOOh, how exciting! So mysterious! Money coming out of nowhere! Must be the cai shen ye hor?!


If your company decides to adjust the fare by a tiny weeeny bit to milk the public cover god-knows-what-is-rising-again cost, then please make sure you also provide better service and standards. I always see those big big bus ads with bus captains beaming with big big yellow stars as the background. It says, star staffs of the month.







EVERY month is the same staffs.

He had waaaaay too much redbull

French boy are sooooo cute! (oh, pardon me~!)

And techno never sound soooooo addictive!



Link

I have a good brother.

Yesterday I was doing my work and kitty disturbed me again. She distracted me, and hence, I forgot to keep my thumbdrive, and so, I don't have my beloved thumbdrive with me today, when I need it to do my work in school.


ARRRGH.


So I ringed home and my elder brother picked up the phone. I got him to add me on MSN and send my files over. I had wanted to just spend one and a half hour to go home and back to pick up my thumbdrive, but he said to me over MSN, "Nevermind, just tell me what you need. I am free today."

And so, my brother patiently zipped up my files and sent to my email.



Ahhh. How I lucky am I to have such a Gor Gor. And how lucky I am to enjoy advance technology at my convenience.


I love my Gor Gor, and I love technology too.

Big Hug! (I am the beloved Po of course!)

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I think it's so darn rude to play your music on the loudspeaker of your handphone at full blast at anywhere. Not everyone appreciate the same kind of music one listens to. What is music to your ears, maybe noise to another.

That's why I was visibly annoyed when someone goes on and play music on her handphone.

TMD, why do you the school refuse to provide speakers to the computers?! To make sure no one make a din outta playing lousy music lah. Then.

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FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK.

Stupid vending machine eat my $1.20.

And it's not like, I'm so darn rich, I can throw my munnies away!

$1.20 can take bus home you know!

Today is not my day. Not my day.